The short and sweet of it

{The camera fades in and we see Jacob Striker standing next to a TV that’s playing a video of his opponent for this week, Jimmy Johnson, and the “Straight Shooter” is rubbing his chin thoughtfully as he watches for a few more seconds before he reaches over and tapes the “PLAY/PAUSE” button on the machine and then turning to face the camera}

Jacob: You know something, I can kind of respect Jimmy Johnson. Mostly because while he acts the comedy act...at least he stays true to himself.

I mean I’ve seen other guys and gals do the whole “comedy act”, only for them to become uber serious in the ring...one moment Robin Williams or Eddie Izzard and the next, they are Havoc or Scott Oasis...but our boy Jimmy Johnson, he at least stays true to his path and that is by far two things more than I’ve seen some people do in the past because number one, it’s a great psychological tactics as by acting the fool during matches, it gets under their skin and it distracts you.

Again, Jimmy is the master there because all the others I’ve ran into simply play the serious card when the match starts.

And two, it makes his opponents take him not as seriously in the ring and that has led to him winning his own fair share of matches now hasn't it?

{Jacob reaches up and taps the screen of the monitor a couple of times}

Jacob: But my question to you Jimmy is that do you think your usual tactics will work on me?

Everybody who takes the time to get down and gets to know me knows that I enjoy a good joke just as much as the next guy...but come Dominion, when that bell rings...well, let’s just say that I hope you take that match seriously because from the moment that my music hits from moment *A* to moment *B*, your hour of stand up, well it just doesn’t exist.

The old Jacob Striker, the one that used to come in to Tears for Fears “Break it down again”...he would’ve loved to go pun for pun with you before everyone decided that by breaking the old Jacob that they could harness that raw brutal talent that Stephanie Matsuda saw in me all of those years back when I first came to her for training.

The current Jacob Striker on the other hand would welcome a charge from your Council of Jimmy’s...just to see if you all scream the *same*.

You see here, Jim-Jim, a lot of people seem to think that I’m just like you...some kind of really big *joke* or that I’m not on somebody’s supposedly great level until finally, I prove them all wrong by twisting them into painful shapes of sadistic art and at Dominion this week, in order to take my *SPOT* in the King of the World tournament...I have to work wonders with the lump of tasteless clay that is you.

Do you understand what I am getting at here, my old son?

It means that at Dominion I’m going to use you as my exhibit A as I start my path towards my dear new “friend” in Indy Darling as our dance for the Territorial championship is very visible on the horizon and does that mean that I’m going to be slacking off just because I’m the *NUMBER ONE CONTENDER*?!

No.

You see back when I first joined the Dominion brand, I admit that I was becoming a little bit...stale for the lack of a better term, and I thought that since I was the f’n prodigy that I could just clear the board and take the title for myself...I allowed my own hubris to catch me with my pants down because it is said, Jim-Jim, that you only improve as a wrestler by facing those in whom you can find *REAL* challenges.

And that was Myojin, I won’t deny it. He had my fucking number and he took it, which made me hunger on how to improve on myself so that the next time he and I stepped into the ring together-I’d almost break his leg in this match.

But things changed and I changed with them.

And while those changes that I’ve made to myself may fucking disgust a lot of the lesser Melvins out there in the world that I’ve been dealing with elsewhere...my principle focus is right here on Dominion and tearing down the house.

I mean look at TJ Thompson, he thought that I was going to be just as easy a mark didn’t he?

And well, what happened to him again?

{Jake looks at the TV monitor for a moment before snapping his fingers a couple of times before snapping his head back to look at the camera}

Jacob: AH YES!!! I laid his arrogant shit ass out and he took a three second tan, he didn’t know what the fuck happened because I knocked the arrogance right out of his ass now didn’t I?

So for Dominion this week I want you at your best, Little Jim-Jim. And I want you to feel humbled that you’re just paving the way for my becoming King of the World.

{Jake then reaches over and hits the power button which then drops everything into darkness as we hear Jake humming to himself in the darkness as we fade out}