Price to pay (v. Amber Payne on Dominion)

It was a common feeling..

Each time there was a big event, a big match.. She would always be on that road to redemption. The process was always the same. Lose the big match, and promise that next time it would get better. The promises never stopped, but they were never completed. Mission wasn’t accomplished, and the feeling of emptiness would always return. Lost In Paradise was no exception to the rule.

With the recent loss to Jacob Striker being surrounded in such controversy, many wanted her to petition for the result to be overruled. Despite the possibility of winning the appeal, she ultimately decided to accept the match for what it was. She had gotten the three count, but it just wasn’t meant to be an official victory.


==So Close..==

The curtains had burst open, and the sad scene took place all over again. The Sweet in Sweetwater stormed past production, adorned in her yellow and blue gear from the match against Striker. She stopped for a second, reaching to the table to grab a pair of scissors. She immediately cut the wrist tape open on both hands before taking it off, and setting the scissors aside.

As she turned the corner, she was met face to face with her mentor and boss, Banch Morgan. He couldn’t even get a word out to explain the situation to her before she threw her hand up in his direction.

“Save it!”

On that note, Lillie Saint had walked away from him, peering around at the talent in the locker room. They didn’t say a word to her, ashamed of what had taken place. It was an awkward situation, made worse by the fact that two of her best friends were in the main event as Zane defended the championship against Crazy Violet. Until she’d have a chance to speak to one of them, she decided to put herself into self isolation. When she finally found a place to be alone, she planted her hands on the table, looking into the mirror. She watched her own eyes with intent, exhaling slightly before trying to clear her head.

“Every time.. Every single damn time! Everybody loves you Lillie, everyone thinks you’re so great, Lillie! You’re so talented, so beautiful, so much fun to watch! The fans love you, the people backstage adore you.. Not ONE of them are looking me in the eye! Not one! Every one of them are shrugging their shoulders and moving on with their day.. Until it happens to them. Every time there is a setback for someone, I always come to them, I always bring them water or a shoulder to cry on.. Every time. Why am I even doing this.. Lillie, why are you doing this?? This has to get better.. Your time needs to come, and it n.. Nee..it needs to happen now… Damn it!”

She felt like she was going to crack. Emotions were running at an all time high, and nobody was around to hear her. Things needed to change, and change fast.



==Yet So Far==

The frustration had slowly disappeared. It was days after the nonsensical finish in her match with Jacob Striker, and the opportunity to move onto the next match. At the Wrestleworld Gym, she felt the most pressure on her that she’s had since her professional debut last year. During her training session, Lillie completed a 45 minute run, 50 suicides across the floor, and multiple segments of using the battle rope to get her aggression out. She had amassed the intense cardio workout.

From the outside of the gym, ace reporter Joy stood outside, speaking with the camera man. Some people within the industry were interested in hearing Lillie’s side of everything going on, and who would be facing her on the upcoming Dominion. Joy was nervous about giving the news, but felt it would be better to try and be the voice of reason for it.

The bell rang as the door flew open. Lillie Saint looked herself over in her designer tank and jeans ensemble. She went to slide on her sunglasses before noticing Joy. Thinking someone else was in the gym, she began to walk by Joy and the Camera man. Joy promptly stopped her with a smile and patted her on the shoulder.

“Lillie Saint, can we have a word with you? You’ve been very busy lately, so hard to reach. How are you feeling?”

With her sunglasses still in her hand, Lillie paused while looking at Joy, giving her a nod before coming to a complete stop. She dropped her bag to the ground and attempted a smile in the camera’s direction.

“I’m a little ill-prepared to talk, I’m sorry. However, I will try my best for you guys. As far as how I’m feeling. Look, I’m still pretty angry about what happened at Lost In Paradise. No matter what I say and what I do, honestly, I can’t change a thing. It happened, and now I have to find a way to bounce back..again. Always back to square one.”

Okay, so maybe the pain of the loss didn’t disappear after all. Lillie’s smile was painted on, a rare occasion. Normally the sense of humor would shine, but the feeling just wasn’t there.

“I’m sorry to hear that. It seems like when you do go back to square one, you usually walk away with momentum following your next match. This time, you have a challenge ahead of you as you go one on one with Amber Payne. Payne, as you know, is one half of the Hybrid Tag Team Champions along side TJ Thompson. What are your thoughts on this match, and more importantly the momentum needed as we head to Arcadia?”

The selected opponent took her by surprise. Lillie looked down at her sunglasses, crouching down to put it into her back before standing herself back up. She lost on pay per view, and now she was scheduled to face one half of the tag team champions.

“Amber Payne? Thee Amber Payne? I don’t want to come off as ungrateful, but I’m not sure if Amber Payne is the right opponent for me. Everyone saw what I did at Lost In Paradise. I came away with the win, and that win was taken away from me. My mentor, my… um.. Close friend, and my closest confidant in this business aside from Emiko, he didn’t go to bat for me. He just let it happen, and instead of getting a rematch with Jacob Striker.. I’m facing Amber Payne. Amber freakin’ Payne. Look darlin’, we don’t talk backstage and certainly haven’t met up much in that ring, but I will tell you this. I know toughness when I see it, and you know I respect it. You’re a wonderful human being and you are caught up in something that I feel you’re not wanting to be in. As tough as you are, you’re just not going to do it against me. You’re talented and your time will come soon, but please don’t.”

Her frustration hit a fever pitch. Despite Joy’s best efforts to keep her calm, Lillie had begun pacing back and forth. She pulled her hair back, tying it into a ponytail before stepping back over to Joy.

“Lillie, it’s okay. I can tell that you’re frustrated with the way things have gone in Wrestleworld lately. Where do you see yourself going forward as we head into Arcadia?”

She had begun to calm herself down.. Up until the moment Joy brought up Arcadia.

“Arcadia? Are you kidding me? Every single time, if you haven’t noticed, that I’ve been on Pay Per View, I have lost. Somehow, some freakin’ way, I have lost. Whether it was losing to Zane.. Okay, I’ll admit, I got bested. World Domination? No.. Ol’ Handjob Nakajima made sure to ruin that moment. And now Jacob Striker.. Taking away another moment. For what? Why should I care about Arcadia if I can’t even get the big wins on Dominion itself? Tell me that one. Amber Payne wants to fight, and I know I can take Amber Payne. I’ll make sure that moment never comes for her on that night. After that, though? I don’t know.. I’ve already lost so much.. My best friend got herself married, my other best friend has gone completely demonic.. I have nothing but coming to the arena and walking out of the arena in my future. Not unless I change it. How can I change it, Joy?”

“By winning?”

“GREAT! I’m not trying to be rude, trust me if I am.. I am so sorry. I just don’t see a place in this business unless I change everything I even thought I knew about professional wrestling. I work from the bottom of the ladder, nothing given. Amber was GIVEN a title shot, and good for her! I’m going to make sure that she knows what it’s like to see someone inside of that ring that has a God damn chip on their shoulder. I don’t know what else to say, Joy? Again, I feel terrible for all these things, but something has to change. I need..Violet back… I’m sorry..”

Lowering her head at the feeling of defeat, Lillie crouched down and grabbed her gym bag. Taking the sunglasses out of the bag, she slid the sunglasses on and picked up the bag before giving Joy one last look. The heartbroken Texan let out a frustrated exhale before making her exit. Joy wanted to chase her down, but stopped herself promptly in order to give Lillie the space. Coming back from that sense of despair could happen, but it would come at a cost she may not be willing to pay..yet.