I suppose the more things change, the more they stay the same, right? You could call this fitting. I wouldn’t, but some might. Fitting. Once upon a time, you and I clashed. It was a magnificent war, wasn’t it? I really think I brought something out in you that you didn’t know was there. You had limitations, and I made the fatal mistake of believing you weren’t capable of going beyond them. God, that was so long ago. It feels like we’ve been trapped in purgatory, doesn’t it? Where exactly have we been since then, Cloud? Can I call you Steph? I feel like we know each other well enough for that. I know right now I have to be strong and act like nothing has fazed me. The past is the past is nothing but a crock of bullshit and we both know it. The past always has a hand in the future. Always. I don’t care who the fuck you are. You’re delusional to think otherwise. And maybe that’s what I’ve been for a long time… Delusional. Yeah, maybe. I mean, who am I to talk about owning up to the past? I don’t even acknowledge the person I used to be. Oh yeah, I’ve pulled things out of the past, like my petty little problem with Scott Oasis and what he did to hurt my career. Sure, there’s been cameos the past has made in my present. But I’ve gone out of my way to ignore the person I used to be. I don’t know how well you know that guy, but he was a good man. A good man that fought with honor and humility. A man that wanted literally nothing more than to prove himself than the absolute best. If only things could be that simple in life, right? If only we could just say “I wanna be the best” like we’re in a television show that won’t live to see a second season. But stories like that don’t survive. Reality sets in and things change. People change. I changed. And it brought me all the way here to a place I now call home. A place that you call home. A place that I wanted nothing more than to evict you from. But I didn’t. I failed. Sure, you walked out that night without your precious American Dream Championship. I called it a win in that aspect, but it wasn’t. It was an abject failure on my part. And we both know the roads we’ve traveled since that night have been filled with more failure and despair.
Believe it or not, Steph, I don’t hate you. I did. Not personally, of course. I don’t know you, nor do I want to know you. I don’t give a shit about your life or your wife or anything else. You just represented something that I needed to exterminate in this company. But I’ve changed again. I’m sure you have too. I’ve learned that it was pointless. How could I convince myself that some stupid little crusade would be enough to put you away? How? Just another part of my delusion. I’ll own up to that. I underestimated you in one of the most disrespectful ways imaginable, and for that, I’m even willing to offer you an apology. I apologize, Steph. You deserved better. The backing I had at the time was trivial and meant nothing in the grand scheme of things. I was a dog chasing after a car, no real intention on what I’d do with it when I got it. Maybe that’s why I failed as the European Champion of this company too. Maybe I just had no substance behind my style and it got the better of me. I could have changed earlier and actually felt something going up against you or winning that Championship, but I didn’t. I felt empty inside. All of it was hollow to me. But you know what happens when you’re falling and the only outcome is death the moment you splat on the ground? You reach for something. Anything. You could be falling out of the clear blue fucking sky knowing full well in your mind nothing is stopping you from hitting the ground and turning into jelly. And yet, you’ll still panic and look for a way out. That’s just how we are. Survival. That’s what we crave. A primal instinct to survive, no matter what the circumstances are. No matter what are odds are. No matter what happens in the end. We still fought. We still reached for something to grab in the blue sky. But you and I… We’re the type of people who will a fucking ledge into existence and save ourselves. And right now we have our ledges. We were both falling, Steph. And we willed them into existence. Yours is named The World’s Finest. Mine is named Ghost Organization.
I’ve come to gain a lot of respect for you, even if you don’t feel the same. I used to see you as nothing more than a pillar that needed to be replaced. I used to see you as nothing more than a name along with other names that I needed to get rid of on my pointless crusade. But I understand now why you’re one of the best to have ever stepped into a ring. I see it now. I get it. I know why I lost last time you and I stood in that ring. Maybe in another life, we could have been allies. But we took long roads that led us down very different paths to very different destinations. Look at me, feeling so sentimental about this… But I can’t help it. Because right now, Steph, we’re standing in more than a ring. You and I are in the eye of a hurricane. You can see it, can’t you? The chaos? The destruction? The wreckage and pain in its wake? You can see the hurricane as well as I do. And more importantly, you know there’s no stopping it. It’s a force of nature. It doesn’t work that way. There’s things in life that can’t be undone. The past can’t be changed. And the present is already in ruins. All that’s left is for someone to use what’s left of the ruins as their throne, and I’ll be damned if that person isn’t me. I’m sorry it’s come to this, Steph. I truly am. What I did to you last Chapter wasn’t personal. It was just a message I needed to send, not only to you, but to Ghost Organization. That message was that I will not die in this hurricane. I will not splat on the fucking ground. If we’re fighting on our ledges until someone loses their grip, then I will do absolutely everything in my power to make certain that person is you. We’re in the shit now, Steph. This is war. Show why you’re the General of your army, because if you don’t bring your absolute best… If you don’t reach your limits… If you don’t go beyond your limits like last time… I promise you, I won’t hesitate to put a bullet in your head and watch you get added to the mass grave on this battlefield.
I’ve told myself a lot of lies. The biggest lie of them all was that I’m not a Stray Dog. I am. Always have been. But I need to accept that, because only a dog like me would rip your fucking throat out in desperation if that’s what it takes to survive.
Sat Dec 03, 2022 4:36 pm by 
Subject: The Calm Before The Storm 
