[A Middle-Aged Man in cheap-looking casual wear walks into a room full of men and women who look to be in their 20’s as he clears his throat.]
Middle-Aged Man: Good afternoon, everybody.
Class: Good afternoon, Mr. Blair.
[Mr. Blair smiles and nods.]
Mr. Blair: And how are we all doing today? Good?
[Some shrug, some politely nod, some just give an ordinary affirmative response as Mr. Blair smiles and nods.]
Mr. Blair: Good, good. That’s great. Hey, I figured today we could tackle something that, in acting, I believe is very crucial. As an actor, you’re bound to land some sort of role in theater or movies or television - heck, could even be in a commercial - where you have to be a convincing couple with someone else. And the vast majority of the time, that someone else is going to be someone you only just met. So I figured today we could perhaps work on playing a convincing significant other to someone you’re not very familiar with. I’d like for everyone to pair up with someone, doesn’t matter what gender, don’t be shy.
[The students of the acting class begin to all pair up as Mr. Blair nods.]
Mr. Blair: Alright, excellent. I’d now like for you all to do one simple thing… Let’s start with simply saying “I love you”. How’s that--
[The doors of the classroom swing open as they’re kicked by Cash Corleone; flanked by Sakura Corleone, and Lupe - their Nanny - who is currently holding Hurricane Corleone.]
Mr. Blair: Oh, I guess you wanted to get things going right away? That’s alright, uhm, students! Everyone!
[Everyone in the classroom looks in the direction of The Corleones as Cash looks visibly annoyed while Sakura takes a seat in the Teacher’s chair.]
Sakura Corleone: Oh, I’m sorry, Lupe, you’ve been walking around with Hurricane all day. Would you like a seat?
Lupe: That would be most kind, Mrs. Corleone. Gracias.
Sakura: Alright, dear, I’ll be sure to alert you when a seat becomes available.
[Sakura smiles and gives Lupe a thumbs up as Mr. Blair continues while Cash crosses his arms.]
Mr. Blair: Students, this is Cassius and Sakura Corleone. They’re a couple who happen to be two very prolific professional wrestlers, actors, and most of all, they’re one of the most powerful couples in the world! They’re absolutely inseparable and have turned their love for one another into a brand of its own. They’re preached it like gospel, and I honestly don’t think I could ever find anyone who’s more of a prime example of what you all should strive for as actors.
Cash: Yeah, except I ain’t acting and neither is Sakura. Our love is as real as it gets.
Mr. Blair: Exactly. It’s such an unbreakable bond. Students, I’d like for Mr. Corleone here to be essentially a Guest Teacher for all of you today. So go ahead and continue with your work and he’ll observe and advise you on what you were doing right and doing wrong.
[The Students begin to continue their work as “I love you” sounds throughout each pairing within the classroom. After 10 seconds, Cash puts a hand up to silence everyone. After several moments of nothing but silence, Cash walks up to a pairing of a cute blond girl and a brown-haired guy as they start to look a little nervous.]
Blond Girl: Oh, uhm… Were we doing it wrong?
Cash: Names.
Blond Girl: Jessica…
Brown-Haired Guy: Chris.
Cash: Jessica… Chris… Say it again.
Brown-Haired Guy: Oh… Alright…. Ahem…. I love you.
Cash: Jessica.
Jessica: I… Love you.
Cash: Hmm, not quite my tempo. A little too slow. Go again.
Jessica: I love you.
Chris: I love you.
Cash: No, not quite right. You’re rushing it. Try again.
Jessica: I love you.
Chris: I love you.
Cash: Hmm…. How do you think you’re doing when you say that? Both of you.
Jessica: I… I think I could do better.
Chris: I’m not sure, do you have any pointers?
Cash: Not sure… Keep saying it.
[Chris and Jessica begin exchanging “I love yous” to each other as Cash walks over to the desk where Sakura is seated as she smiles at Cash. Chris and Jessica continue as Sakura pulls out a wrench from her purse and hands it to Cash, who immediately turns around and chucks it as hard as he can at Chris’ head; who just barely ducks out of the way as the wrench hits the wall so hard it gets stuck in it. Chris and Jessica look at Cash in fear as a stunned Mr. Blair begins to walk forward.]
Mr. Blair: Now hold on, Mr. Cor--
[Cash puts a hand up to stop and silence Mr. Blair as he walks up to Jessica and Cash.]
Cash: How about now?
Chris: I.. I..
Cash: I.. I.. What, did the wrench connect with your head after all? Did you just suffer brain damage and can’t form a simple fucking sentence? I asked what you did wrong. Jessica, what did you both do wrong?
Jessica: Uhm…
Cash: What’s the matter, sweetie, is this more thought than you’ve put into anything in your entire life? I know this sounds like a big task for you, but try to pull the cock out of your mouth and speak clearly. Now I’ll ask both of your dipshits again… What did you do wrong?
Chris: I… We were too… Slow?
[Everyone stands in silence for several moments as Cash just stares at Jessica and Chris.]
Cash: You don’t have a fucking clue do you? Either one of you. Why should I be surprised? Chris clearly hasn’t seen a pussy since the day he was born and the closest he’ll ever come to telling a woman “I love you” is when he says goodbye to his cunt mother before he heads out to this class! And Jessica obviously hasn’t ever heard the words “I love you” among the army of guys running a fucking train on her every night! You both absolutely fucking ASTOUND me! And you want to be ACTORS? Get fucking real! You both couldn’t act if your fucking miserable lives depended on it! Typical! Two typical decent-enough looking fuckwits realized getting a real job was below them so they started taking this scam of a class to LEARN how to act! You don’t LEARN how to love someone! You don’t learn it! This isn’t your fucking geometry class, and if it were you’d both fucking fail it all over again anyway!
[Cash begins to pace around as everyone looks on while Sakura claps and cheers in the background.]
Cash: So why do you think I threw a wrench at your skull, huh? Why? Because you both are fucking hopeless pieces of trash and the only “acting” you’ll ever reach is pretending to be the daughter of your next client before he fucks you and being in gay porn! Neither one of you could even REMOTELY capture what it means to tell another person that you love them, and anyone with functioning ears could hear it! You know why I threw a wrench at you? Because that was the last resort I had! Clearly! What brings together two people more than trauma? What tightens a bond more than abject fear? Pain! Suffering! You two are so fucking useless that not even THAT could help you!
Sakura: They’re as hopeless as Alyssa, my Cassius!
Cash: That’s right. Exactly. Thank you, Sakura. That’s why Sakura is rich and talented and famous and the rest of you would spend the rest of your lives licking the mud off of her boots if you got even a fraction of what she has! You two are every bit as hopeless as a woman by the name of Alyssa Grace! You know who Alyssa Grace is, right? No? I didn’t think so. Because in due time, that name will no longer exist on anyone of any importance. In case you pieces of shit couldn’t take a hint, there’s nothing that pisses me off more than people who can’t fucking fathom what it is to love someone. You two morons don’t even get the honor of being a prime example of that because there’s nobody on God’s fucking green earth that could ever top Alyssa Grace!
[Cash looks around at the rest of the class with wild eyes while Mr. Blair steps forward to try to finally stop all of this, only for Sakura to toss a second wrench at his direction.]
Cash: Let me tell you a story, boys and girls. The story of a man who loves a woman. Man loves a woman. Man wants woman. Man does everything he can to get woman. And woman… Denies him? She rejects him? She declines? She has the audacity to fight and struggle against a man who craves her so? Alyssa Grace has committed something that goes against everything that Sakura and I stand for. That ginger-haired little bitch had the balls to take the love that my associate known as Wraith so kindly gave to her on a silver fucking platter… And toss it all away? Just like that? As if it meant NOTHING? Alyssa Grace is a stupid, ignorant, selfish little girl who doesn’t know what true love is. True love IS obsession! It IS pursuit! It IS taking what you desire, no matter what! I would hunt down and gut any person who even showed the slightest hint of attraction towards my Sakura! I would go to the ends of the earth to take her and keep her, because she belongs to ME! No one else! No one! And Sakura? She would go even further! She would kill everyone in her path for me! She would do anything and everything for ME! That’s what love is! And I didn’t believe it. I was skeptical. I gave Alyssa the benefit of the doubt. I thought maybe it was all just some wild misunderstanding. Maybe Wraith was simply exaggerating. Maybe it was only a matter of time before his love got through to her…
[Cash abruptly kicks a chair across the room as it crashes into a wall as Mr. Blair and the students look on.]
Cash: Oh but I was wrong… I was so very fucking wrong. Instead what I witnessed at Chapter 13 was none other than a woman who’s literally too fucking dumb to understand how good she really has it. I don’t know what kind of pieces of trash raised her. Maybe her mother smoked and drank while pregnant. Maybe she was dropped on her head as a baby.. Maybe she ate one too many paint chips as a child. And yet even then, there is no excuse for it. There is no getting around it. Alyssa Grace struck a chord deep down within me that fills me with absolute rage, and now I see what I have to do. I wanted this match on DOMINION, and I wanted it more than you could ever fucking imagine. I hope everyone in this classroom tunes in and sees with their own eyes what true love is. True love is what I’m going to do to Alyssa Grace for insulting The One True Pairing. True love is the mauling that this stupid, ignorant bitch is going to endure for denying Wraith’s desire for her. True love… Is the pain and the suffering and the agonizing torture that someone has to go through to understand it. She’ll see it. Oh yeah, she’ll fucking see it. Even if it’s like she’s on the outside looking in. Even if it’s all too late to turn back and change the past for the better. She’s gonna see it.
Sakura: Amen!
Cash: She’s gonna open her eyes and realize just how good she had it before she found herself being beaten within an inch of her life… Her body being twisted and contorted at my hands… She’s gonna realize that accepting Wraith’s love wasn’t so bad in comparison to what’s waiting for her. And right now in whatever gutter she’s inhabiting, Alyssa is helping herself get to sleep tonight knowing that she got the better of me at Chapter 13. She doesn’t know what’s coming next. When I’ve got her all by herself. When I’ve got a mission that she can’t hope to stop. But she’ll see what it was all for, and she’ll understand what true love means… Even if it’s all in a flash among the final seconds she spends on this earth before I break that little bitch in half.
[Cash walks over to Sakura, who stands up. They both passionately kiss as they look one another in the eyes.]
Cash: I love you more than life itself, my Cherry Blossom.
Sakura: I love you more than anything in the world, my Cassius.
[Cash looks at the class.]
Cash: That’s love.
[Cash and Sakura hold hands as they take their leave while Lupe follows behind with Hurricane in her arms.]
Cash: Fucking idiots.
Sakura: Oh my God, Lupe, you’re so slow! Hurricane doesn’t like being behind us! We’re equals!! You’re fired when we get home!
[Mr. Blair quickly rushes over to the door and locks it as The Corleones are fully gone. Mr. Blair and the students in the class all breath in relief as the camera slowly fades to black.]
Sat Dec 03, 2022 4:36 pm by 
Subject: True Love 
