The Last Laugh

Tokyo Haneda Airport
Friday, October 16th
Early Afternoon







Stephanie stepped out of the plane, hiding her eyes from the sun as she made her way into the terminal. While Japan was less intense than America with its fanfare, The War Queen still wore a hood and shades to hide from the public. Like in The States, it was common for the press to wait around airports to get pictures of celebrities. There were times where Matsuda didn’t mind the attention, but she was exhausted from travel. For the first time in the longest, she was able to relax at home before the big pay per view match. It’s been a while since she was able to properly train. It wasn’t just the match Stephanie was worried about but what might happen after it. Kevin Devastation was in current possession of the sapphire briefcase and while she had no beef with the legend turned mogul, there was no telling what was going happen after the scramble match. She made a promise to herself that she was going to do everything in her power to walk into Arcadia with the American Dream Championship. The War Queen was at the peak of her career and she could feel it. Life had no guarantees; all of this could go away within a moment’s notice. She was always grateful for the fruits of her labor, but now the deck was stacked against her. She was on Claudia’s hitlist and there was nothing that was going to stop the Architect from making her life miserable. Matsuda would never utter this to another person, but she knew she was fighting a losing battle. Claudia was the house, and eventually, the house always won. 



Her business partner Azumi wasn’t able to pick her up, but her protege Sora Todoh did. The JET graduate was in the car that JET staff used to get around town whenever they didn’t have access to their vehicle. Stephanie was happy to see her, proud of what the girl has accomplished so far. They talked about the Grand Prix JET just held and how Sora fared. The topic of Azumit Goto’s retirement was brought up, with both women feeling a little sullen from seeing her last match. Stephanie tried to not think about when she was going to call it quits. She and Monica already discussed having a family and after some back and forth, her wife decided that she was going to be the first one to bear a child. Stephanie didn’t like the idea of being a mother while on the road. She saw how much the road life destroyed families. Her own mentor almost ruined his marriage, and recently, she had to comfort her godchildren as they watch their father attack their mother on OWA’s Friday Night Olympus. There’s a whole host of questions she had for Nas, but Tarah made her promise to stay out of it. This business could eat you alive and spit you back out.  

Saitama, Japan
Friday, October 16
Late Night



After checking into her hotel room, Stephanie decided to shower and go out for the night. Sora had to drive back to Tokyo but promised to back on Sunday to watch her live. It’s not often she got to relax in Saitama. In fact, despite co-owning a joshi promotion, spending time in Japan was more of a luxury given the lack of personal time. She and Monica were thinking of living in Tokyo once Stephanie retired, but once again that was a topic she didn’t feel like thinking about. She was at her peak; she was becoming a pillar of the industry, an icon like she always envisioned herself to be. This was the mountain top she used to fantasize about as a newbie...now she needed to do whatever it took to not get knocked off.

As Stephanie crossed the street, she noticed a small bar across the street, situated between several other establishments. The nightlife was indeed active, and tourists who were probably there for By the Sword was very evident. Matsuda adjusted her glasses and made her way to the bar. She wanted to avoid crowds and while having a drink to herself. She needed to get her mind right before Sunday. She was in her father’s homeland; in fact, he was going to be there live. Everyone she’s known and loved will have their eyes on her at By the Sword. This may be her most important match since dethroning Claudia for the belt.



Ash Saitama
Saturday, October 17th
Early Morning




We open to the dark and smoky interior of the Ash Saitama bar, located in the heart of Saitama. It’s around 1:30 am, a half-hour from the last call, and most of the patrons have already left for the night. Minus a couple of regulars and the bartender, the only other soul in the establishment was none other than the War Queen herself, Stephanie “Cloud” Matsuda. The American Dream Champion was sitting in the back, nursing a glass of whiskey. Her eyes were glazed over, possibly a side effect from how much she was drinking. She seemed deep in thought, and despite sitting in the back, the aura she gave off a vibe that she encompassed the surrounding space as well. Matsuda clearly looked like she wanted to be by herself as she continued to drink. While her mind wandered, she was aware of the camera guy she hired was doing his job. 


“Japan is an interesting place. Because of who I am, I’m worshipped as a sports icon. But if I was a normal Blasian in a lesbian relationship living out her days in Tokyo, there would be limitations to how far I could go in some certain fields of industry. I’d have to think outside the box to be seen as exceptional by the general public, though I’d have my supporters. Recently, my father’s homeland is going through something of a resurgence, led by the future leaders of tomorrow. It reminds me of my much simpler days in this business, where the biggest thrill was being booked for an actual match. Eventually, I became someone who brought Western eyes to joshi wrestling due to my run as a world champion in JET. Now five years and four world titles later, I sit here in this Saitama bar addressing those who would be my first title defense with this American Dream Championship that’s sitting next to me. It’s funny - I’m in my father’s country defending a belt representative of the country my mother served. This is a “full-circle” moment for me. I feel like Luke at the end of Return of the Jedi when he realizes what he has to do to make things right. This might be a stretch, but this Sunday I will be fighting my second most important match here in Wrestleworld. I spent a whole year hyping myself up, preparing for the day I could adorn one of four titles held by our esteemed architects. But as each door closed, I found myself locking eyes with Claudia Michaels. I campaigned against her for months on end, once again hyping myself to the masses, while making a plea for why I should be the inaugural American Dream Champion. And at Dreamworld, in the biggest match of my career, I stated my case. Now, I need to back up everything I’ve spent the previous season. This match will decide if I’m the real deal or nothing but hype. It doesn’t matter if I’m holding two other world titles. It doesn’t matter if I’m a double champ in another promotion. What matters right now is if I can prove to myself and the world at large that I deserve to represent my mother’s homeland in what some say is the biggest cluster of talent since the Land of the Elite in the 2010s. I stand proudly next to Shogun Champ Arata, European Champ Ozymandias, and Campeones del Mundo de Parejas Bear and Jag Connection. Heh, my wife likes it when I speak Spanish. Anyhow, I had to watch what my opponents Drago Santiago and Jay Jones had to say on their first go around and I must say I’m quite impressed.”

Stephanie took a sip from her whiskey glass before she continued.

“So, Jay Jones aka ‘Baby’s First Create-a-Wrestler,’ let’s start off with you. That serious, monotone speech works well for you, so stick with that. You’re right about being in the right place at the right time. You benefitted from Cash’s failure and now you’re in the co-main event while Cash has been sent into obscurity by Violet and myself. I’ll be honest - I don’t have anything against you, kid. The shit-talking I’m about to do it for the views, but there will be truth woven into the words coming out of my mouth, so I suggest you pay attention. One thing I like about you is your mutual dislike of Claudia. Maybe I had you pegged wrong, I can admit when I’m wrong. That doesn’t change the fact that you didn’t earn the opportunity to stand in the same ring as me. You’re going to be standing face-to-face with a War Queen in her absolute iconic prime. At least you hate Drago enough to not double team with him on me, so that’s one less thing I have to worry about. But, I want to touch on something you said in your opening statement. You claim that you don’t care about gold. I remember the days when I used to act like I was too cool for school, so allow me to educate you. Belts, accolades, etc. are used as milestones to measure one’s accomplishments. It’s why sports have the postseason and tennis have Grand Slams. It’s one thing to be good at something, but how does one compare themselves to the rest of the world. I as your reigning American Dream Champion implies that I’m the best in the world when it comes to “American-style” wrestling. I’m not talking about the catch-as-catch-can shit that originated in Europe, but your classic, down-home, anything goes rasslin’. I’m talking about that Mid-South Memphis shit where you drag your opponent around in a fucking leash and beat the living hell out of them. That’s what this belt symbolizes, Jay. Pure wanton anarchy, sweets. You have to sit back and think to yourself: ‘can I handle this? Can I take on Cloudy when she’s at her absolute worst!? Because this might be a scramble match, but the belt never has to leave me. I’m a fucking joshi, we’re used to going thirty, forty, sixty minutes at full throttle. In fact, It was my stamina that helped me beat April and Claudia. Both women are just as skilled as me, just as experienced. But, the Queen’s Road is a long one. Your endurance is pushed to the limit and in the end, it takes everything to defeat your opponent. For 322 days I was the Champion of the Queen’s Road. Eight women tried to take me down but failed to do so. Jay, I will be the one with the advantage in this match. You need to know and understand that you will only be playing a supporting role in my reign as I fight my way to Arcadia. There’s no shame in losing against me, Jay. You’ll learn a thing or two and become a better fight because of it.” 

Stephanie nodded as she considered her thoughts.

“It’s one thing to say you’ll win by any means, and it’s another to actually go through with it. You know how many dreams I’ve shattered, Jay? You know how many upset people there are whose hopes I crushed under my heel because it was either me or them? I take no pleasure from what I had to do, but I don’t flinch when destroying someone else’s legacy. In this business, you gamble everything when you enter the squared circle. And at the end of the day, only a few of us can sit back and say it was worth it. You said I have restraint...heh, I don’t, sweets. You must not have been born around 2017, because I ended my ex-girlfriend’s career in the center of the ring. Ask April, she called the match! She saw me take a path I can never come back from, even if I do regret what I’ve done. Regret has nothing to do with implementation. If I have to survive, I’ll do what needs to be done. Before colonization, American Natives would live off the land doing whatever was needed to survive. And when the Europeans came, these colonizers blazed a trail of tears across the nation to get to the other side. They experienced what life in the wild was like. My American Dream reign is about adapting and overcoming whatever comes my way. You and Drago are obstacles to eliminated, nothing more, nothing less. Just a series of trials that Mother Nature - ie. Claudia - has thrown my way to test my abilities. No matter what Claudia has in store for me, I will win. She can’t break me, and neither can you or Drago. Which reminds me…”

Stephanie’s eyes looked up to the camera as they narrowed slowly.

“You had one shot, and you wasted it, Santiago. You could’ve been known as the man who broke the War Queen, but instead, you’re the one who tried and failed. I like to consider that to be a trend in things to come because there’s no way in hell I’m going to let you walk out of Dodge with my legacy. Your opening words hinted at the impression I’ve left on this industry. There are many who travel the road I’ve paved, countless imitators who claim to be Queens, but I’ve only met two other women worthy of that name. One was my tag partner, and the second is my current ride or die. Anybody else can be thrown overboard. This is my ship, sweets. I’m the fucking captain! It took me a while to decipher those Tarantino/Edgar Wright one-liners of yours, but it sounds like you think I can’t back up what I say. Hmm, interesting. Forget about my accolades for a second. In fact, I’m not going to defend shit. Because I want you to think you have this in the bag, sweets. I want you to walk in there with your chest puffed out, confident that you’re doing to have the last laugh. I want you to rely on that fucking Prototype armbar like you’re spamming the B button in a game of Smash Brothers. Because unlike you, I have a menu of tricks under my sleeve. ‘Ooooh you have a submission, I should be scared!’ I’ve been making bitches tap way before your emo phase, sweets. This year alone I made Claudia’s daughter tap with the Matsuda Lock. That’s what won me my second world title...in four months. I need you to know and understand the woman you’re slinging your lyrics at because everyone is a tough guy until they get punched in the face. What happens when you’re stunned and you can’t formulate a thought in that artistic brain of yours? What happens when we’re twenty-five minutes in and you can keep up with me in the last five minutes of the match? You’re hardcore? Fine, whatever. I’ve stood face to face against some of the edgiest kids in this industry and they’ve all said the same thing. Pomp and circumstance can only get you so far, love. It’s easy to evaluate me in these bi-weekly episodes of fuckery. But when judgment day is here, when it comes time to pay the piper, can you measure up? You’re a Catholic, sweets. You know exactly what I’m talking about. When that bell rings and I become a multi-headed dragon with my five crows - each representing the five titles I’ve won in less than I year - CAN YOU FUCKING HACK IT!? When the Seibu Dome turns into fucking Revelations, what will you do, my son? Because when it’s just us and little ‘ol Jay, there is no God. It’s just me, you, and our blonde companion. I guess what I’m trying to say is you’ll be in hell for heaven’s sake. You made the grave mistake of thinking I’m someone who was sleepwalking throughout her time in Wrestleworld, but that’s because you don’t know me. You can’t feel my heart, sweets. You don’t know what drives me, what haunts me at night when I’m trying to have a peaceful sleep. You kids think you know what nightmares are, but heh...you’ve never danced with the devil under any pale moonlight. Not the ones I’ve danced with.”

Stephanie sat back and took another sip of whiskey.

“Drago and Jay...I’m sure you’re prepping your responses to my interview from the other day. I’m sure you think of me as some kind of mean spirited bitch with her head up her ass or some delusional wannabe leader, and you know what? I’ll validate your statements. I want you to believe whatever you want about me because there’s no better advantage to have over your opponent than when they’re completely wrong about you. The difference between me and the two of you is that you both think I’m making shit up. You look at my experience as something that’s beneficial to the past, and not the future. Experience is the roadmap that keeps you on the road to success. I’m successful because I treat everyone I walk into the squared circle as an absolute threat. I’m going to fight you with the same aggression I’ve shown Claudia and April. And yet, the outcome will be the same. Because as I’ve mentioned countless times before, when you’re fighting to protect a legacy, it’s different than trying to build one. It’s the equivalent of protecting your home from an invading force. It’s like building a Great Wall to protect you from rampaging nomads. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that in this story, you’re the nomads. The two of you are the outsiders to the world I’m trying to build for myself and others. There’s a benefit to being a champion, one that goes unseen. It has nothing to do with the gold around your waist, but rather the attention people give you. With that attention comes opportunities. What I’ve been able to accomplish outside of the ring is because of what I’ve done inside of it. Losing to the likes of you two will take that all away…” 

Stephanie made a face as she reconsidered what she said.

“Well, it actually won’t. I’ll still be who I am. You two have everything to gain from this. You look at me as the opposition, like some warped celebrity, but the thing is, the ugly truth is that either of you is not strong even to take away what I’ve built. That’s why Claudia is disappointed in the two of you. Think about it - if a legend like her couldn’t accomplish my demise, then what the hell are either of you going to do? This isn’t me underestimating either of you - your noses are up at me right now, not the other way around. Because at the end of the day, it doesn’t matter how many limos I ride in, or how many checks I cash. My success came at the expense of others. That’s the reality of our business. I know defeating the both of you means little Drago and Jay go back down the card. Meanwhile, if I lose, nothing happens. In fact, I’ll probably be set up for another title. Life is fair, I know. I was once where you were. But the difference is I didn’t give a fuck then and I certainly don’t give a fuck now. I know what I stand for, and if a certain orange-faced asshole can’t make America great again, then shit I might as well give it as shot.”

Stephanie finished off the last of her whiskey glass and closed her eyes as she savored the taste.

“In a Scramble Match, the last one to get a pin or submission is the one with the last laugh. Heh, that reminds of a saying my former boss used to say. ‘He who laughs last laughs best’. I’d like to think with everything I’ve been through after everyone told me I couldn’t make it, or I didn’t have what it takes, that I’m the one, in the end, laughing with this empty glass of whiskey in my hand.”

Stephanie chuckled as she raised her hand, signaling for a refill.

“I’m not done drinking, so I guess I’ll be laughing my way into Arcadia.”

Stephanie puts her glass out as the waitress gives her a refill and walk away. Matsuda turns to the camera one more time and winks.

“lol.”